Letting go...

One thing I have learnt over the past few years is that letting go is a continual process, you have to do it over and over and over again to truly let go, especially when it involves the heart. It takes time and it’s painful but it does eventually get easier. Even letting go of control and learning to just go with the flow and trust the divine timing of the Universe, isn’t easy and takes time to get the hang of, especially if you’re impatient like me, or the old me. It has taken a long time and many painful lessons to get to where I am now. Sometimes it feels like I’m afloat in a vast ocean with only my faith and intuition to guide me but as long as I keep moving forward and stay focused I know that everything will be ok.

222222

I had a dream a while back featuring the numbers 222222. After googling the meaning, I discovered that the number sequence was to do with ‘Trusting’, ‘Believing’ and having ‘Patience’. Over the past few years I have been struggling with just that – life lessons that can sometimes take a lifetime to master and indeed they have. Well today is the 22nd of February 2022… 22.2.2022 and if that makes it a significant date then it must mark something special. To me it feels like the beginning of an amazing chapter in my life… finally free from the rat race and living the life I have always dreamed of in the country as an artist, as myself. I am happy and at peace with where I am and who I am. I trust the timing of the Universe and believe that anything is possible as long as you truly believe. And finally I am mastering the ultimate life lesson of all – patience. I’m not perfect by any means but learning to embrace the messiness that life throws at me and let go of the reigns has completely changed my life… less stress, more laughter and more singing at the top of my lungs while driving with all the windows down (no one can hear me way out here). xo

‘Phoebe’s New Tree’ - by Kaz Clarke

Follow your Heart

Being creative is my life, my oxygen, without which I would probably curl up and die and I had gotten to a point in my life where I almost did… so that’s why I recently decided to follow my heart (and my true path) to Cowra NSW to become a full-time artist.

Throughout a long career as a Graphic Designer, Illustrator, (wife and mum…) the pull of my heart just became stronger and stronger until finally I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Then Life threw everything at me and I had no other choice but to follow where my heart led… which was back to my true self, my artist self. It’s been one hell of a ride over the past few years but I have never, ever felt so happy or alive than I do right now.

SO here I go… plunging into a love of drawing big faces in charcoal and expressive painting on big canvases with Phoebe at the steering wheel. My newly cleaned out shed studio (minus 2 huge rats!) is ready to get creatively messy and SO AM I… xo

‘Battlefield’ by Kaz Clarke - an expressive painting I did in 2020.

10 years of Phoebe!

It’s been a while and sooo much has happened… so I thought it was time I did a new Phoebe, especially being Christmas! Then, as I was thinking about snorkels, it hit me… it’s been 10 years since Phoebe first appeared as a rough sketch on paper. In that time she has evolved from a messy headed lost soul finding her way through the dark into a spiritual guru following the path of enlightenment… or is that me?! Thank you Phoebe for all your whimsical wisdom and humorous twists as we found our way back on track. I say ‘we’ because Phoebe is me on the inside - my soul, my inner voice, my true self. Without Phoebe appearing when I needed help, I’m not sure I would have made it this far. She has been my guiding light, the one true thing that sparked my creative spirit and lit it up like a fire cracker.

SO enough of that! Here’s my latest Phoebe… a Christmasy tribute to the very first Phoebe illo I ever did on the 1st of November 2011 which if you’re into number sequences, was 1.11.11. Freaky? Maybe! Or it was meant to be… the beginning of a 10 year journey to find my true self, my heart and happiness. Anyway, here it is… story and all.

Phoebe ‘Good Gracious!’

Phoebe ‘Good Gracious!’

Phoebe was almost unrecognisable in her full PPE which clashed with her pure and simple intentions for Christmas. She had wanted to spread light, love and joy as far wide and as she graciously could, without all the over-indulging in wayward Christmas consumerism, fancy feasting or exhaustive multi-venue socialising. This year was simply about giving from the heart. Unfortunately for Phoebs, this year was also about not giving or spreading (you know what), which complicated everything. If only her goggles would stop fogging up so that she could actually see where she was going… xo

Spreading love and light (not germs) to all this Christmas,
Kazxo

PS. Below is an image of the very first Phoebe illo I did in 2011…

Phoebe ‘Scary’ - The Phoebe that started it all… She’s certainly grown up since then!

100 humorous illos later...

Recently completed 100 illustrations for an extremely funny adult humour book called ‘100 Things That Piss Me Off!’ written by Ross Burns. It was a HUGE job and took so much longer the I anticipated but so worthwhile in the end. There’s something special about doing work for books, the’re something we treasure, something we gift, something that can put a smile on someones’s face. Books hang around for a long time and definitely make a difference in this world.

If you’re interested in an extremely funny read then you must buy this book. I had to read it to be able to do the illustrations and I kid you not, I was killing myself laughing!

If you’d like to buy a copy just go to: http://www.vividpublishing.com.au/100things

So Happy...

Since opening my heart, I’ve found it much easier to just go and paint whenever. Sounds crazy but for many years, when my heart was blocked, I wasn’t able to - it took a lot to get me into the studio and even then, sometimes I would just pace the floor and feel uneasy and not be able to do anything, as if someone had tied my hands behind my back. It used to take a lot of work to break through that invisible barrier, sometimes I did it but other times it beat me.

I look back on those days with sadness. Now I just go and paint whenever I feel like it. I don’t even have a proper studio (my old shed is going to be my painting studio as soon as I get that leaky roof fixed!) but it doesn’t matter, as long as my music is playing and I’m outside because my style of painting is very messy! The music that speaks to me at the moment is Pete Murray - LOVE, love love it! He gets me through my day, through my work and is fantastic to paint to. The painting above is called ‘So Happy’ and I’m happy to say there is no black paint used whatsoever, which is very unusual for me but definitely speaks volumes about where my heart and soul are right now. A few years back I remember doing a painting that was basically all black!!! That was a very bad time…

Phoebe 'Treasure Chest'

Phoebe had ventured far, far back in time to face truths she had never faced before. Why on earth was she back here? And why was the pain so raw? Maybe this was the last of the entangled webs to clear out of the deep dark corners of her soul before she could propell forever forward onto her true path. Sometimes you just need to get in there and give everything a good clean out before you can start a fresh. And if you come across the missing key to that treasure chest you’ve had hidden away down there for an eternity, then make sure you open it before you go…

A heart is no good to anyone unless it is open. xo

Heart & Soul

“In the silence we can hear our souls speak.”

I love silence, peace and alone time – it cures everything. It is a blessing. I can hear myself think – it brings a calmness into my world. Early morning is my favourite alone time - it’s my precious “Ah ha!” time when I write and enjoy the best cup of tea ever. It allows me to breathe, clear my head of too many thoughts and prepare for the day ahead. To have a whole day alone is bliss - I’m so thankful for these days.

Right now I feel blessed and happy with who I am and where I am. Can’t imagine being where I was before ever again… I was barely living, just existing. This is my life now – no rushing, just living and being grateful. I’ve finally found the simple life I was dreaming of before, and music that speaks to my heart and soul and keeps me where I need to be.

I love this place – I feel safe and happy here. Finding it was meant to be, even though at the time I didn’t fully know this, but I trusted my gut and took the plunge. Now I know it’s where I’m meant to be right now, for this chapter of my life. Outside my kitchen window there’s a beautiful mountain that whispers to me and tells me the truth of what was before – it connects me to this place, it grounds me. Not far from my door, the countryside calls me to take long drives to loosen any stress that tries to attach itself. It makes me feel free and happy to be alive.

I am so thankful for all the lessons that my old life taught me – they led me here – where a whole new life awaits. This is my time, my life, my true path and my dream come true. I’m thankful for all that I have right now but my life is still a work in progress and there is so much more ahead of me yet… x

Phoebe 'Stranded'

Phoebe was stranded. There was no toilet paper left… anywhere! Where had it all gone? What was a girl to do?

(But seriously, in case of emergency, here's a useful list of toilet paper alternatives: grass, leaves, newspaper, phone book, love letters from your Ex, hate mail, bills… Let me know if you have any other suggestions?)

The Coronavirus Pandemic has brought out the best and the worst in us all. Apart from the widespread anxiety we feel, I have to say it has also made us think a little differently. How did people survive before toilet paper and supermarkets that are open every day?? I don’t know about you but it has certainly made me think, especially now I have more time on my hands due to a loss of work and lets not forget, less money! Can’t help but think there has to be something good to gain from all this… only time will tell.

Kazxo

Illustrations for a Children's Book finished!

‘Skadoodle & Snug’s Magnificent Plan’ written by Caroline Tuohey, illustrated by Karen Sagovac

Recently I illustrated this children’s book for Larrikin House. The publisher wanted the illustrations to be done in the same style as my crazy cats. This meant hours (and days and weeks…) of drawing by hand with colour pencil. It was epic but exhilarating! I haven’t done anything on this scale by hand… ever (these days I prefer to work digitally). The book comes out mid 2020. Cant wait!

On to the next one now. More funny animals in humorous situations. It doesn’t get better than that? I feel very privileged to be able to illustrate another children’s book. A dream come true!

You can see more illustrations from this book under LATEST PROJECTS.

Plastic

Lately I have started focusing my attention more outward rather than inward. I’m done with trying to improve my life, be positive and solve my mental problems. What I’ve realised is that I am who I am and I need to accept that and move on to more important things like saving the world. Ha! You may say. But if not me then who? And if not now then when? If we all think like this then that means it won’t be just me trying to save the world but millions and trillions of people trying to save it! Surely that will make a difference? So from now on Phoebe is going to share messages with the entire world, illustration by illustration, story by story, blog post by blog post. Messages to wake us all up from our inward obsessions with happiness because how can we be happy if we have no where to live?? And besides that… Planet Phoebe is way to small to migrate to so don’t even think about it!

Read on for Phoebe’s latest story…

PLASTIC - Keep your eyes on the ball! Lets stop the Plastic Plague together!

PLASTIC

Phoebe hadn’t been down to Earth for quite some time. In fact, she had been so preoccupied with her own little world that she had almost forgotten that she was part of a much bigger picture. Peering out into the universe, she was shocked by what she saw. The earth was no longer a sparkling jewel of blue, white and green, but rather resembled a big ball of plastic in 50 shades of fluoro… What on Earth had happened?!

Hind sight: Choose wisely and avoid Plastic…x

Planet Phoebe Friday - 'Hug'

Hmmm... this week has been sooo busy and suddenly its Friday again. Feel like I've forgotten to do something really important... oh that's right! My Planet Phoebe Friday Post! Damn!! Here it is... 

Hug - Sometimes you just need a hug...

HUG

Phoebe needed a hug. There was something comforting abut hugs that made everything feel better. A hug could stop her feeling  lonely, comfort her when she was sad, make her feel loved and even make her feel safe. It didn’t need anything else to back it up - a simple hug said it all. And if no one was around and she needed a hug? She could always just hug herself.

Hugs fix everything... xo

Planet Phoebe Friday - 'Butterfly'

This week I'm sharing one of my most precious Phoebe illustrations with you, one I have been holding very close to my heart. In fact, it hasn't seen the light of day until now. It was created last year after a 6 month spell from doing no Phoebe illustrations at all. Sort of a creative coma - an artistic block - I was unable to actually do a finished colour illo. Sounds weird, I know, but just like a writers block, it takes a lot to break through it. This was the magic Phoebe that broke the drought...

BUTTERFLY - Sometimes you just need a little magic...

Phoebe felt blah. She was over it, in fact, she was over everything. Nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Even making lists didn’t seem to help. What was her problem? Why was everything such a mess? How did it get this bad? She didn’t even know herself in the mirror anymore. It just made her want to crawl back inside her cocoon and hide, Maybe if she disappeared for a while, someone else would sort it all out. Then she could re emerge like a beautiful butterfly, refreshed and renewed, back into a perfectly sorted life and start again.

Sometimes you just need a little magic to get you through... x

Planet Phoebe Friday - 'Bubble'

Wow! Its Planet Phoebe Friday again? I think I might have missed a couple - its been a crazy busy month. Phoebe on the other hand has been floating around in her own little world...

BUBBLE – "...completely out of touch."

Phoebe was having trouble grasping reality. It felt like she was floating in a bubble slightly above the world. She could see the pain and trauma, she could read the words, but she couldn’t hear anything – she was just out of reach. Everything looked surreal. Inside the bubble she couldn’t feel anything. She was numb to reality. But because nothing could get through to her, she couldn’t understand what was going on. It appeared she was completely out of touch.

Stay in touch,
Kazxo

PLANET PHOEBE FRIDAY – 'Swamp'

Oh my goodness, its Planet Phoebe Friday AND its been 3 weeks since my last post?! Unfortunately real life can sometimes get in the way of creative endeavours. However, I’m back and Phoebe is back, although feeling a little overwhelmed…

SWAMP - "Sometimes you just need a relaxing bath."

Phoebe was swamped by doubt, in fact, her mind felt exactly like a dark, murky swamp. She was bogged - overwhelmed by an entangled soup of swampy green envy and bubbling self doubt. Lets face it, she was a bit over-dramatic sometimes... nothing a good cup of tea couldn’t fix though?! 

 Tea fixes everything... x

Ok promise I will try not to miss posting next week... surely Phoebe will be back to her whimsical self by then?! 

Planet Phoebe Friday – 'Good Book'

Ahhh!! Planet Phoebe Friday has crept up on me and caught me unawares... its been a crazy week so might need to chill out later with a good book...

GOOD BOOK – "Sometimes all you need is a good book."

Phoebe was sooooo tired... so tired that she thought she’d catch an early night in and curl up with a good book. Unfortunately the book wasn’t that good (and she really wasn’t that into books...) so before she knew it, she had literally fallen sleep (yawn) curled up with her book... z z z zzz.

Sometimes all you need is a good book... xo

Have a relaxing (yawn) weekend! See you next Friday...  Kazxo

Planet Phoebe Friday – 'Bounce'

Yay! Its Planet Phoebe Friday! Hope you have some amazing plans for the weekend? If not, get your hair done anyway, at least then you will feel amazing?!

Bounce – Sometimes you just need a haircut...

Finally, Phoebe had made an appointment with the hairdresser to get her hair done. A bit of a snip, some swooshy styling and lots of hairspray later and wholah! It was done. It looked fab, in fact, she couldn't stop looking at yourself in the mirror... Phoebe? Her hair had so much extra bouffe and bounce! It was so bouncy, she could now actually sit on it without even nearing the ground... cool!

Sometimes you just need a haircut... xo

Enjoy your week... see you next Friday!
Kaz xo